february started out bad with the double-whammy of psycho-co-worker calling followed by the wretched ignoring at the art opening, and now it’s going out even worse with day after day of badness. my face has forgotten how to smile, and i’ve lost all any sense of gratefulness i had. my back is tied in knots, and there’s a pain right between my shoulder blades that i can’t seem to ignore.
i have so much to say, and i’ve lost my smile.
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Pain right between the shoulder blades? First, check for a knife. I know it seems obvious but most office workers overlook this. There’s a good reason why the Japanese always have their desks face the door instead of the wall.
Lost smile? Check the bathroom mirror. That’s where I left mine this morning and I’ll be damned if I’m walking all the way back to get it.
But it’s almost March! and that’s when my birthday is, so now you have a reason to be happy! See how easy that was?!
You need a relaxing, full-body massage.
If there’s a knife lodged in there, a well-trained massage therapist will be able to remove it and apply pressure to stem the flow of blood while screaming for someone to call 911.