Hi Darling Ones,

How goes it? I’m eating Dots for the first time in nearly three years and they are delicious. I’ve missed Dots. I also miss Starburst. I do not miss jellybeans because I keep an empty Talenti-pint of them in my nightstand drawer for low blood sugar purposes. And, let me tell you, nothing cures your craving for FaveReds jellybeans (RIP greenbag starburst jellybeans) like chewing them at 3 a.m., grinding sugar into your recently brushed teeth while your glucose monitor will not shut the fuck up about your impending death by low blood sugar.

ANYWAY, I miss Dots, but not more than I enjoy having a 5.4 A1C.

Orange you glad you asked? Nobody asked, but I am feeling icky about having fallen off the writing wagon. Today’s probably not the best day to write because my head is especially “strokey,” which makes focussing extra difficult. Like most of my strokiness I do things just to spite it as if this collection of annoyances has a personality.

Along with eating Dots I’m also listening to the new Amanda Shires’ album. It came out yesterday and so I’m still pondering it. The jury is still out in the Court of Spinster Opinion. One of these days I’m gonna get around to writing about The Beths’ new record because I love it so much I had to text my friend Hotrod heart eyes emojis about it.

I’ve also been listening to Stoned: Jewelry, Obsession, and How Desire Shapes the World by Aja Raden and it is fabulous. It’s my favorite kind of nonfiction — well-written, funny, and filled with news-to-me stuff. For instance did you know that emeralds are green because of Chromium? Me neither and now I love them even more.

Most of my time, though, is spent pondering what I’m going to do with the rest of my life if/when I get on the dole. What will I do if I don’t use my brain capacity worrying about money and my time trying to earn money? I’m not sure. In the before I’d just write and write and write some more. It’s what I’ve always longed for the time and freedom to write. Now that I might get that, writing is physically taxing. My Floppy Scoop and eyes are not fans of the typing and reading. I’ve certainly been cursed with be careful what you wish for. Or so it seems.

Floudneringly yours,
Jodi

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Hola Darling Ones,

I’m becoming the kind of person who says “hola” in greeting. I say it about 93 times a day. Each time a cat comes down the stairs I say, “Hola, Gatito/Gatita. I love you. You’re a cat!”

They often need reminders both that I love them and that they’re cats. I don’t want them to forget, especially because Fergus’ theme song is about her being the worst.

In my head it’s a Gidgetesque song. A Jodi & Fergus duet that goes like this:
Whose the worst cat in the whole wide world?
It’s Fergus!
That’s me! (and she says this with one of her furry paws in the air, toe beans on display)

Who’s a total delight while she’s ruining your life?
It’s Fergus!
That’s me!

She’s a menace to her father.
A menace to her brother.
A menace to every one who loves her.
It’s Fergus!
That’s me!

See? We have fun!

Anyway, I came here to write a few words of appreciation. I didn’t appreciate anything in March and I feel a little shitty about that. Not because anyone cares, but because I let myself down by not doing it. I’ve lost or am redefining so much of who I am that it feels icky when I don’t write.

The Antidote by Karen Russell

My favorite novel so far this year. Five stars! Inventive and smart, though I have a few reservations about it.

It’s about a Prairie Witch in dust bowl era Nebraska who is a vault for people’s memories. They deposit them into her and get a deposit slip they can use to retrieve the memory at a later date.

There’s also a basketball loving teen girl, her bachelor uncle, a photographer, a cat, a scarecrow, a photographer, and a sheriff. There’s a bunch of history and magical realism and all of it is wonderful. A story about weather and the land and what we did to it and what role our memories play in making us whole. I loved it all. If you read it we must talk!

Earth to Moon by Moon Unit Zappa

I did not expect much from this memoir by Frank Zappa’s eldest child. I knew of her vaguely because of MTV and the song Valley Girl. But I like music and music-adjacent books. This one was a damn delight. Zappa is funny and smart, and tells the story of her family with honesty. It’s not a happy story and while she has much more empathy for her mother, I do not. Gail Zappa was a vindictive monster. Check it out if you’re into music, sacrifices people make to “male genius,” or twisted moms.

The Latest Jams

A few words about some records I’ve been digging recently.

• “Send a Prayer My Way,” Julien Baker & Torres. In the BS (before stroke) era, this would have been an automatic pre-order, but I can’t buy records anymore due to being poor. However, thanks to streaming I get to listen to this lovely lesbian country album. I super appreciate it because it’s matching up nicely with a book I read recently (The Exvangelicals by Sarah McCammon) and making me think about religious trauma.
• “Big Ugly,” Fust. You know I don’t often give new male artists a lot of my attention, so you know this has gotta be good. It gives me a bit of that 70s country rock vibe. Plus, they have a song called “Jody” and I forgive them the misspelling.
• “Billboard Heart,” Deep Sea Diver. Do you like rock & roll music? You’ll like this.
• “I Don’t Know But How They Found Me!” Jensen McRae. Listen if you like well-written, deeply emotional songs by young women. I love this one because the feelings are universal, but the perspective is new to me (she’s like 30 years young than I am).

What have you been reading or listening to, Darling Ones?

Love,
Jodi (not Jody)

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