Hi Darling Ones,

One more day. We can do it! Here’s three things I wanted to mention before the year ended.

A Crowded House

As is tradition, I hosted Rock & Roll Bookclub Dirty Santa on the 28th and it was most excellent. My college-era friend Ray came from Madison and at one point he, Sister #2, and Wolfdogg were chatting in the dining room. Ben & Max were preparing dinner in the kitchen, Hannah & Jaycie were on the couch chatting with Cade, my mom, and Sister #4, and I turned to Heather, who was sitting next to me and said, “This makes me so happy.”

There’s nothing quite like having your house crowded with people you love making a joyous racket. My eyes well with happy tears and my arms are goose bumped at the memory. I’m so fortunate to have so many wonderful people and I told every single one of them I loved them that night. Lucky me.

For The Love of God, Make Your Own Website

I’ve been on the record for a long time about how I wish blogs would come back. I miss the early aughts when blogging was all the rage and everyone wrote one and was messy all over the internet. It was so fun!

This piece by Gita Jackson gets at why we need our own damn websites:
We were already long overdue for a return to websites we control, rather than feeds manipulated by tech oligarchs

It reminds me of the Matt Haughey quote from 2016. “Blogging gave a billion people their own typewriter but turns out 15yrs later everyone prefers writing at 3 typewriter factories instead.”

Kind Neighbors & 2020 Jodi

On December 22nd I was awakened from slumber by voice saying, “hello, hello.” Since I was half asleep I wasn’t sure what was going on.

“Hello.” A woman’s voice said from downstairs. “Hello?”
“Are you in my house?” I asked from my bed upstairs.
“Yes,” she said. “I’m your neighbor. Your front door is open. I’m just going to shut it.”
“Thank you SO MUCH,” I said from under the covers.
“It’s locked,” she said. “I’m just going to unlock it and then shut it.”

I got dressed quicker than I ever have since my stroke in March 2023 and hustled downstairs where it was a frigid 48º in my living room. All cats, presents, and laptops were accounted for. Holy shit!

When I went to bed the night before my furnace kept kicking in. I checked the thermostat app on my phone and it said it was 54º in the living room. Since it was about 108º upstairs I thought my Nest thermostat had gone wiggy. Climbing the stairs is a harrowing journey and I wasn’t about to do it to deal with a wonky thermostat at midnight. So I went to bed planning to deal with it the morning.

I never imagined my FRONT DOOR WAS OPEN ALL NIGHT. IN DECEMBER. IN MINNESOTA.

Holy shit!

The deadbolt on my front door had been sticking so I was only using the bottom twisty lock until Ben could look at it.

So that’s why I had to spend $200+ on a fancy new lock I can lock/unlock with my phone. This was on top of the $1000 I spent on a new dishwasher & microwave the first week of December. Oh, and there was a surprise leaky toilet that cost $300 on December 27th.

Y’all I’m real broke. Please think positive thoughts I can get on the dole because I also need a $1600 water softener and to, you know, eat, afford meds, mortgage, and those kinds of good things in life. Ayiyiyiyi.

However, I do owe a boatload of appreciation to 2020 Jodi who socked away all the COVID money back in 2020, saving for a rainy day. Thanks to her I’ve survived thus far without going into debt. YAY, us!

Here’s to a 2025 with more to appreciate and 0 trips to the ER.

Jodi

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Hi Darling Ones,

As you now, I’ve struggled through November. It’s rough. When people ask me how stroke recovery us going I say, “It’s difficult (or annoying or frustrating or a pain in my ass), but I’m lucky I got to be annoyed/frustrated, etc. I could have died!”

In my deep-dark, icy-robot heat I’m shouting “THIS IS TOTAL CRAP. NO FAIR!” and also, my old standby “WHY CAN’T ANYTHING EVER BE EASY.”

Empotionallly, things are getting a little bit better (see below) and I did find a few things to enjoy this crappy month.

Pink Pony Club (Chappell Roan cover) led by Waxahatchee

My pal Solace shared this on Bluesky and it made my week. In a month where I’ve struggled to find joy, this singalong with one of my favorites was a nice hit of it.

The 25 Most Important Recipes of the Past 100 Years

This is worth a scroll if you like to eat, and worth a read if you like to learn about food. There were some surprising omissions Schrödinger’s Meatloaf and any kind of hotish (though that’s probably older than 100 years). Though they do have something called “Green Bean Bake” that is a casserole and includes cream of soup (which is a necessity in my definition of hotdish). There’s also “Tunnel of Fudge Cake” which sounds like poop and I’ll probably name for bookclub because it uses my beloved bundt pan.

Holiday Prep

The winter holidays are pretty fraught for some people. I’ve done battle with them myself for a good portion of my life. Some of my most horrific childhood memories concern Christmas. Yes, memories, plural. Thanks, dysfunctional family!

As a grown-up I’ve taken back Christmas. With my friends and family we’ve slowly built much loved traditions.

Like lots of women, I put a lot of work into Christmas. Shopping, wrapping, cooking, hosting, crafting, etc. I used to get really stressed out about it, and in my weaker moments I still do. What I’ve realized, and what I yap about a lot now, is if you don’t find joy in doing it, don’t do it.

I legit love getting ready for the Holidays. I ordered 200+ chocolate truffles yesterday. There’s five different kinds of coffee creamer in my freezer. My sister mentioned how that’s one of her favorite parts of Christmas. The different creamers.

Tonight I’m gonna crochet my fingers off while watching a professional wrestling documentary my nephew told me about, and then I’m going to look for a vintage butter dish for my niece. It’s tons of my favorite things at once. I’m so lucky.

Ho-ho-hoping the holidays make it bright,
Jodi

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Hi Darling Ones,

Here’s a look at some of the stuff I’ve been digging this month. I spared you the Barley Chronicles but will sum it up as OMG BARLEY! Who knew?

People Who Listen to My Election Anxiety

You can always tell when somethings got my anxiety on high – I don’t shut up about it. As the election draws nearer I’m rambling to everyone about how anxious it’s making me. I’m afraid if Harris wins and I’m afraid if she loses. I do not trust Republicans to handle this election and any outcome like rational adults.

I’m reminded after I had my colonoscopy when I told the guy they had six years (or whenever I need another one) to get the prep stuff to taste like a milkshake.

“Everyone says the prep is the worst,” he said.
“Eh,” I said. “Everyone must have a bad imagination. It wasn’t fun but it wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be.”

That’s how my brain is doing the election. I’m imaging large-scale armed insurrection where Republicans take Coon Rapids and the Dakota and I need to hunker down in Supergenuis HQ trying to participate in some kind of underground railroad for Trump’s “enemies” and that’s the scenario if Harris wins!

OBSERVATIONS FROM A CROWDED ROOM, Joy Oladokun

As a white midewestern lady it feels weird to write about how much I enjoy Oladokun’s new record about dealing with racism and her role in music.

But it’s smart, beautiful record and the least I can do is bear witness. I’ve been a fan since I first stumbled on “sorry isn’t good enough.”

This new record is chef’s kiss and one of those I’ve listened to in its entirety every day. I love when she talks about James Baldwin and waiting for progress. “I’d Miss the Birds” is my favorite song on the record. So sad and beautiful, my favorite combo next to sweet and salty.

We Are Living in a Golden Age of Apples

I love apples and am #TeamHoneycrisp, though I’ll SweeTango and Cosmic Crisp will do in a pinch. I also love whatever green apple AffyTapple uses. Red Delicious are garbage and I’d rather have zero apples than one of those things.

This article about apples is fascinating and not at all boring even thought it contains words like “genome” and “Mesopotamia.”

Really liked this bit:
“I spoke with several apple researchers while working on this story, and do you know who loves their jobs? Apple researchers. And that’s not just because they get to taste new varieties all the time and spend workdays in an orchard. All of them, as well as the other orchardists and hobbyists I know, are proud of the progress they’ve made in the past few decades and optimistic about the future.”

On Legacies, Noticing, and Being Seen

This 20-minute talk pulled at my heart strings and made my neurons fire. And it gave me goosebumps. Just watch it. I don’t want to say more and spoil the delight.

A Few Books

I’m gonna keep this part short because the Floppy Scoop is protesting and my eyes are starting to not focus.

Icarus by K. Ancrum — a lovely YA novel about art theft and finding your community.

The Plot and The Sequel by Jean Hanff Korelitz — literary mysteries in the truest sense of the word. Plagiarism and death and black mail and so so so funny,

Blue Sisters by Coco Mellors — while nothing earth-shatteringly original or even surprising, it’s a lovely book about grief and sisterhood. Really hit me where it counts because it’s about four sisters and that’s my weakness.

What have you dug this lovely October?

Jodi

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Hi Darling Ones,

I spent the last few days in La Piscina de K-Dizzle (what I call Sister #4’s pool), but managed to appreciate some other things this month.

Kris Kristofferson

I mentioned on Bluesky that there were a billion reasons to adore Kris Kristofferson, then I linked to “Sister Sinead”. Shocking, when “Jody and the Kid” was right there. Sinead trumps stupidly-spelled, male-narrator Jody songs.

When I think of Kris Kristofferson I didn’t think Highwaymen or Bobby McGee, I always went first to “Chelsea Walls” a movie I loved 22 years ago. It’s an Ethan Hawke-directed indie movie where Kristofferson plays a cranky writer afraid to love. I loved the movie so much I got an entirely unsuccessful Uma Thurman-esque hair cut. Surprise! I did not look at all like Uma.

RIP Kris Kristofferson, unlike the little girl in the movies I often fell for men who looked like you and totally knew why.

“I.R.L.,” Amy Abts

This it a big ol’ brag because I have friends that do some really really cool things, like this rad song.

Affy Tapple

You can have all your pumpkin spice crap and your candy corn garbage, give me all the caramel apples. I say it every fall, “I’m an Affy Tapple girl in a pumpkin spice world.” Seeing these caramel-coated beauties in the store was always the real harbinger of autumn for me. Because I can’t go to the store anymore, I had to wait until they appeared on the website . . . and they’re here! My buzz was a bit harshed when my shopper mistakenly got me the peanut ones, when the plain ones are far superior. Still, even a subpar Affy Tapple is better than no Affy Tapples.

Exactly Why Are Friendship Breakups So Brutal?

This was an interesting read. I’m doing much better about the end of my 22-year relationship with BFK. It’s been more than a year since we last hung out. In October, it will be a year since I actively communicated with her. I apologized profusely when she said she wasn’t sure she could trust me after I had blabbed something to my family. I’m still not certain what it was I said, but have zero doubt I did blab.

Anyway, friendship break-ups do suck. They hurt as much as romantic break-ups. And I’m so grateful I have a posse of other friends (EM in WI, the Tea Ladies) who have helped me through it.

How to Monetize a Blog

“If we are not writing to make money, what are we writing for? To teach? To freely impart this trove of wisdom that we have spent an ongoing lifetime to harness? Free information does not put socks on feet. Respect doesn’t put cheeseburgers in refrigerators.”

What a delicious and smart piece of sarcasm. I always wonder what people who toss ads all over their blog are gaining? I had ads on iwilldare.com for ages and I think I made like $300 total. So not worth it.

Aunt Jackie

Mine, not the one on Roseanne though she rules too. My mom’s older sister was here for two months, staying at Sister #4’s house. Jackie would tagalong on grocery day & we’d eat lunch while some random 60s playlist played on Spotify. Jackie talked endlessly about how much she loved Elvis. What it was like seeing him in concert. It was great. My mom isn’t so much with the music, so it was fun to have someone of a different generation to talk to about music. Her favorite song is “I Can Dream” and her face lit up when it came on the way I imagine mine does when “I Will Dare” comes on.

What are you digging?

Curiously,
Jodi

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Hello Darling Ones,

How is your summer winding down? Mine has been filled with the west coast fam, who have slowly trickled in over the past week and start to trickle out on Sunday. It’s been a delight to have them here. One of the best side effects of the stroke and benefits of Lexapro is really, really appreciating my family. The Lexapro has eased all the anxiety-based annoyance, and my new disabled state makes me so happy to have some help.

Despite that I’ve been in a low-key constant state of annoyance because I have to wear a heart monitor for 30 days and it itches like a motherfucker. I had a small glimmer of hope that i’d only be 2 weeks, since the monitor instructions clearly state I must take it off and send it back after 14 days. Wednesday another monitor showed up. Damnit.

And even though, despite such petty hardship, I’ve still found things to appreciate this month,

Nick Cave on Hope

“It took a devastation to understand the idea of mortal value, and it took a devastation to find hope,” he says.

I feel that in my bones. The stroke was my devastation and while my inherent cynicism and nihilism is still with me, I try to let love and hope have a larger role in my life. It’s difficult because so much pisses me off and I’m a jaded, untrusting GenXer to my core, but you can find joy in annoyance, hilarity in anger, and even when I’m crabby as hell about my tremor or inability to balance on my own two feet, I’m so happy I get to be crabby. Dying in March 2023 would have sucked.

Thistlefoot by GennaRose Nethercott

I loved this book. It swept away to a world with walking houses, Russian folklore, and magical twins. It was a delight to spend time with the Yaga siblings and their weird house. If you’re in the mood for some really good storytelling, you can’t go wrong with this book.

Sierra Ferrell, Trail of Flowers

I’m a little late to the party on this record, which came out in March. Now that I’m here, I’m not leaving. This is twangy and smart, with tons of nostalgia. Some of that really classic country sound like “I Could Drive You Crazy” scared me away. I’m not always a fan of that early, early Grand Ol’ Opry sounded stuff. It was “Dollar Bill Bar” and “American Dreaming” that won me over, and now I can see the charm in “Crazy” even if it’s not my favorite.

Who was Dan Patch?

Being a child of lifelong residents of Savage, MN I know who Dan Patch is. I worked at Dan Patch Lanes for years, so the 1:55 record is forever etched in my memory. You can’t go anywhere in Savage without being inundated with Dan Patch. The clinic I go to is in Savage and the lobby/waiting area is exclusively decorated in Dan Patch pictures. The Culver’s in Savage had a huge history of Marion Savage and Dan Patch on the walls. It might still be there I haven’t been to the Culver’s since 2007.

I’m extra-special appreciative of everything today. The west coast fam got news that a good, good friend died this morning. They were only 44 and was diagnosed with cancer around the same time I had the stroke.

Cancer is the worst of all motherfuckers, roughly 3,994,382 times worse than an itchy heart monitor.

I appreciate you, Darling Ones.

Love,
Jodi

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