Comments on: you’re gonna make me cry if you don’t know

By: jodi

jodi — Tue, 07 May 2002 22:58:03 +0000

thank you, thank you all for the wise and sage advice. i think i did get a bit more upset than the situation really warranted. i am prone to drama queen theatrics, especially on sunday nights.

it’s not bothering me now. but i still think sister #2 was a big ol’ bitch with the way she delivered the information.

By: alan

alan — Tue, 07 May 2002 14:23:41 +0000

be glad you even get invited to the family picture. I lived a few hours away and the only way i found out about the family picture was by seeing it in my mothers living room.

By: Xena

Xena — Mon, 06 May 2002 20:51:48 +0000

Do you really know why it’s bugging you? Is it just this instance or a pattern of behavior? Can you trace it back to something when you were young? (When most of our “sore spots” are born)?

I get told the same thing you do, and here’s how I’ve developed my own barometer: Does it still bother me in 3 days? A week? If someone else did the same thing – would I be just as hurt? Were other things going on when I was told that? If I told this situation to someone who isn’t family, what do they say? Do they think that was rude?

If it bugs you – so be it. Don’t be sorry for that. Only you can determine that you were being too sensitive.

IMO, anyone who tells someone they were being “too sensitive” without employing any empathy in their delivery of that message are the same idiots that say “I was just joking – what? Can’t you take a joke?” when you call them on an insult.

By: Kool Keith

Kool Keith — Mon, 06 May 2002 19:43:17 +0000

Well, just for another perspective, I think you’re being too sensitive. It’s hard to organize three or four people at the same time. Sometimes you just happen to be together. What are you going to do, say “hold everything until we call Jodi?” I don’t know, but I think that’s asking a lot. If it’s pre-meditated planning where you’re being excluded, that’s a little less understandable, but still it happens some time. It doesn’t mean anything terrible. IMHO.

By: betsy

betsy — Mon, 06 May 2002 13:22:45 +0000

Actually, I don’t think you are being too sensitive. Your sister knows that it could bother you, and then she brought it up, possibly thinking it’s better she tell you rather than you finding out later, but still, it also sounds like possibly she was trying to rub it in. Just remember, they are not perfect, just like we are not, we all make mistakes. Eleanor Roosevelt said no one can hurt you without you letting it be done. My older sister caused me so much pain that I eventually just stopped dealing with her. I was surprised when she (my sister) asked that we go to a counselor. I spoke to him first and related all the old wounds, etc. He said biology doesn’t always mean you have to stick together if you are involved in unhealthy relationships with your family members. It sounds like you get a lot of support from your family, so maybe that’s why it seemed to hurt. But if you are aware that you don’t have to stick with them, maybe it will make it easier to decide if you are going to let their mistakes cut to the bone or if you decide to blow them off as occasional oblivitrons. While they were all hanging together, you were in the best company, yourself, I mean can anyone else get along with yourself as well as you do? Probably not. So be grateful that you and yourself are so compatible. take care.